Day 22

A bit late on this post . . .

I can't decide if I should be proud of myself for my amazingly strong mind that can argue my way into and out of a paper bag, or curse my mind for being so good at mentally convincing me that I don't want to do what it is I say I want to do.  Gahh.  If nothing else in life, I can say I am good at arguing myself out of (and perhaps into) things. 

I have not been very good with my yoga these last few days and have missed more days than I want to admit.  Sometimes life has gotten legitimately in the way - like when we had to go to the Urgent Care on Friday because Brad gotten bitten by a dog - but most of the time I haven't been practicing because I have been too busy making excuses in my head as to why I can't.  Mostly its because "I don't have time" or "I am too tired" (this is a big one).  I have been fixated on going to yoga classes at the studio (since evidentally I paid for an unlimited amount of them) and thats one reason why I haven't been getting my yoga in - I keep blaming my schedule not jiving with the studio's schedule.  Just another "story" as they say in group.  I need to suck it up, take more responsibility, and just get the yoga done.  I need to shut off the voice in the mind (my little monster) and act from an authentic place - not the place of guilt or shame or resentment that the voice in mind is winning, and that I am failing at this.  If that means I get the yoga done, which I can do regardless of the excuses I keep coming up with, great.  If I can't do my yoga then I need to forgive myself, brush myself off, and try again the next day.

As Baron says "Drop your brain, drop your expectations, and just let go and flow"